I wish I was more excited for this..
But I'm afraid I realize where the unbalance is coming from.
I do not want to ruin anything I have going with Daniel, because it is too early to make any decisions.
However, I just don't feel
completely comfortable around him.
He was ridiculously sweet, almost too traditional and sweet.
I LOVE a guy who buys me flowers on the first date. You can NEVER go wrong with flowers.
And I like to be taken out to eat. But as high maintenance as I may be, I am 20. I have no reason to be going on dates to a restaurant where you MUST make a reservation .and people wear gowns and pimp suits to go have dinner that costs like 120 dollars for 2 people to eat...
to me, IT'S RETARDED to spend that much money on fucking food.
I mean anniversary date, that would be like the cutest thing in the world. I would appreciate it more.
I understand him wanting to impress me and show me that I'm a great girl who should be treated like a queen and he wanted to make a good impression, but I can tell that this wouldn't change.
It's just a TAD too much.
-.-
he literally opened every door for me, including the car door. which WAS cute the first time when he picked me up from my house...
then he did it every single time I got in the car.
EVERY single time.
I had to say something about it too and even so, all he said was "I know i don't have to do it, but I will"
I just did not like it.
I feel like he tries to hard, and he will always try too hard.
It's so obvious.
I like suave, ease, and impressive.
And he lacks the first two...
He has taste and respect which I like..
But he seems too clean cut for someone as edgy as I am.
If i were 30something, I would be down for a relationship like this.
But I'm not 30 something and it's just too much at once and I specifically said I wanted to take things slow and just get to know each other cause I'm not good with "dating" so soon. And now I feel pushed towards dating just because of the extravagant showers of kindness he's given me...
Going to the concert alone would have been a nice casual date.
I would've been completely happy with flowers and a concert. and some smooth hand holding or a kiss at that perfect moment. Not blantantly obvious and awkward, spoken/asked for.
I mean I am commpletely appreciative of the experience we had on friday, mostly because of how much he spent and how amazing it was to see incubus in concert. BUT jeez
EVEN that wasn't all I was hoping it'd be...for us at least. incubus was <3333 but i cannot STAND a guy who doesn't get a little zealous for his love of a band at a concert...he sat the entire time..no screaming, no standing up, no swaying, no singing REALLY loudly...NONE OF THAT..just a clap clap clap clap every couple of songs
I wanted to stand up on my chair the entire time and I kinda wanted to smoke a blunt and feel my oneness that incubus has helped me fullfill..
It was slightly bothering me that we were both sitting down, in the front seat section and he didn't even try to hold my hands cause he kept figgiting with his own nervousness....
And the only time we did stand for a song [pardon me] he just stood.
Later, he apologized for not being one of those crazy fans like that...but that's just not his personality regardless if the band is his favorite.
I mean there is SOMETHING there with us, but I don't know if it is the something that I personally need..
I'll keep thinking on this.
2:20 a.m. - 2011-10-03
Recent entries:
Lose another day here, lose another year here... - 2013-04-19
and that's just how I feel - 2012-11-02
- - 2012-05-16
the truth is in the unknown. - 2012-05-08
FAQs - 2012-02-09
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